This morning, I was talking to the front desk about Anthony Bourdain and when he went to Ensenada. She told me she had never heard of him so I told him to check him out.
A guest at the hotel overheard me saying that and asked ‘Did you see his documentary? It’s so depressing. Don’t watch it - Wait until it comes out to see it at home if you have to.’
And I thought for a second… People don’t have a single clue what it actually means to have a personality like Bourdain. Speaking from a personal observation, as someone who thinks he is a very similar traveler to him.
It’s a reminder that most people have no idea the amount of chaos that is mixed around and inside of a mind like that. The loneliness, the poor decisions, the late nights and heartbreaks. The doubts. The fears and questions. The mistakes and regrets often dwelled over.
The search. The relentless, endless, merciless search for something. Anything. To fill that hole and quiet those doubts and regrets. That search goes all over the world, in every possible place that you think you might be able to find it. But you never actually find it because you learn later - The thing you were searching for could have only come from within you. And maybe from a strong relationship that keeps you tethered to the real world.
So you numb yourself to the realities of the search and enjoy a life of pure adventure along the way.
That journey surely is lonely and strange.